The word ‘young’ seems to hold no real conviction when spoken. It only seems to limit others.
However, as time went by, Katharine found her another “Caleb” again, all thanks to that word.
Some say, if you’ve ever loved someone deeply, meeting someone who looks just like them could rekindle that love.
But Eleanor wasn’t sure if Katharine, later with a happy family and children, had ever forgotten her Caleb.
Back then, Eleanor had crossed paths with Katharine at Caleb’s grave. They hadn’t seen each other in years, both wearing black berets, carrying flowers, holding their children, heads bowed in their own worlds.
When Eleanor reached Caleb’s tombstone and saw fresh flowers, she turned and looked for Katharine among the countless graves.
That silhouette seemed to have hurried through and disappeared into the dense forest, never to look back.
Every year, no matter how early Eleanor arrived, there was always a bouquet of fresh flowers at Caleb’s grave.
She thought, she must never have forgotten.
But that’s a story for another time. Now, Eleanor only knew that Katharine, who had attempted suicide several times, was living a life worse than death.
Everyone said Katharine had gone mad, and she indeed did for a while. But the loss of her child seemed to awaken her from her haze.
She knew it was her own negligence that caused her child to bleed several times, and ultimately leave her forever…
She held Eleanor and said many words, all blaming herself – blaming herself for always hitting and scolding Caleb when they were together, never being gentle with him; blaming herself for always demanding things of Caleb like a princess but didn’t love him enough; blaming herself for not even protecting the last trace of Caleb in this world, labeling herself as a bad, selfish person.
Because, from beginning to end, she only cared about herself.
After hearing these words, Eleanor cried all night. She knew too well what it felt like to lose a loved one.
Before when she thought she had lost Bernard, and she was even more devastated than Katharine.
She held Katharine, patted her back, and comforted her until she fell asleep, while Eleanor stayed awake.
The next day, Katharine’s phone rang. The sound startled her awake.
She got up from Eleanor’s arms like a madwoman, not even putting on her shoes, and frantically searched for her phone.
She found it and, with tears streaming down her face and trembling hands, she opened the latest message on her social media.
It was from Caleb’s new account, an account she had forced him to create, allowing him to only communicate with her.
She saw a new message from Caleb:
This message is scheduled. If I’m not back by now, chances are I’m gone
I’m sorry. I promised to marry you, to spend the rest of my life with you, but I couldn’t keep those promises
I wasn’t a good boyfriend. Blame me, resent me, it’s okay.
Just don’t be sad, and don’t blame Mr. Laurence. He’s someone I’d give my life for.
When I was a kid, stealing food and being chased by stray dogs, beaten by people, it was Mr. Laurence who saved me.
He’s done a lot for me. Many times, he’s been the one to stand in front of me during missions.
This time, I think it’s my turn to repay him. So, Katharine, don’t blame him, okay?
Also, I love you. Even if I’m gone, I’ll still love you in another world.
You were the first person I liked, you were my first woman. You’re irreplaceable in my heart.
I don’t want you to be depressed because of my departure.
I want you to always be my proud princess.
So, princess, go to the church we agreed to visit, pray for me for a year, okay?
If after a year in front of God, you still remember me, I’ll definitely visit you in another form.
After reading this letter, Katharine was in tears. She hadn’t expected Caleb to have predicted his own death.
He was already prepared, yet he had left her behind. But why, if he had decided to die, did he still want to be with her?
Holding her phone, Katharine cried, “It was me who forced him to be with me.”
Could she blame Caleb? No.
Her relationship with Caleb was something she had insisted on.
Eleanor held Katharine, who was crying uncontrollably.
Unable to find any words, she could only offer her endless tears for comfort.